So I don’t really think about this too often, but my wife and I are rapidly approaching ten years being married.
Woah.
I try not to talk to too many others about the circumstances surrounding our marriage, because most of the people who ask about it are young kids thinking about taking the plunge. I don’t want to give them false hope – the reality is my wife and I are the exception, not the rule. Most teenage marriages end in dismal failure very quickly after they start.
I think the trick is not to let it change things. Most folks get married and it’s a huge stressful event full of changes – in my personal opinion if you were ready to be married you’d already be acting almost like you’re married anyway… shared finances, living together, etc. The more drastic changes you tack on just because “it’s what married couples do” the more likely all that stress is going to take it’s toll on you.
With us, absolutely nothing changed. It’s just a piece of paper and some words. We skipped all the drama of picking out engagement rings that cost more than a car, elaborate ceremonies full of people you hate and the inevitable end-of-the-honeymoon period that sees you in your first real fight. There’s another thing, if you haven’t really fought with someone – don’t get married. If you never fight, someone’s giving in – and sooner or later they’ll get sick of it.
But yeah, about another year and 3 months and we’ll have been married for ten long years.