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I hear this crap every day, and it’s pissing me off. Automatic transmissions are bad, ABS is bad, TCS is bad. Just quit it already.

First of all, I would consider myself an automotive enthusiast, albeit a light one… I grew up around things with engines on them, and my inner-geek is intrigued by the workings of all systems, not just those with LEDs and screens. I learned to drive in a manual transmission, and I got my license in a manual transmission.

I think everyone should know how to drive a manual, but that’s where it ends for me. Driving an automatic doesn’t make you less of a man – I’m secure enough in my manhood to get from point A to point B without feeling the need to grab some phallic control lever ever few seconds. Most of the people I see saying this crap are wannabe-racers who feel like they’re driving faster if they rev-out, slam the shifter through the gates and then grip the steering wheel as if they’re about to be rounded on the home turn.

I have to wonder about the genitalia-inadequacies of these types of people “I only drive stick-shifts”… the types of dumbshits who jack off into bags of random ferrari parts and disable the ABS on an otherwise okay vehicle. Don’t even get me started on that.

ABS is there for a reason, and even though every pencil-dicked retard will claim they can out-brake ABS for the most part they’re full of shit. You can’t modulate brakes at the same rate those little servos can, and while there’s some truth in the whole “more parts to break” theory, a well maintained ABS system works good in the majority of panic-brake situations.

Where are these people, unfortunately, right? I don’t particularly have a problem with an adult who owns a vehicle in full disabling (partially or fully) torque management systems. There are times when you might want that extra oomph (or to light up a pair of perfectly good tires) and if you’re a responsible adult who wants to inhale a couple hundred bucks in rubber who am I to disagree. Teenagers who don’t know any better, or adults who haven’t finished paying off their vehicles probably don’t want to be subjecting their drive-train to that kind of hurt.

Cars that parallel park themselves are a definite bad idea. I’m not speaking in automotive-luddite terms here either, but the inability to parallel park illustrates a blatant lack of understanding of the mechanics of driving.

While I’m quick to disown the “driving purists” who seem to want us all to go back to wearing aviation goggles while we drive, we must walk a fine line about understanding how to operate a vehicle… regardless of how “appliance-like” they get, because there’s no amount of technology that can make up for the fact that you’re still piloting several hundred pounds of metal projectile down the road.

But no, we’re not all still driving cars with drum brakes, manual-chokes, wood-spoke wheels and open-diffs. Nope, these “automotive-luddites” are perfectly content to use technology when they don’t feel “doing it old school” can help their manliness. Driving a stick-shift is what real men do, one wheel peels aren’t.

… put nude pics on the internet, other people can see them? Oh my god!

That’s what people are basically saying about Facebook these days. I’m not a big Facebook user, but I do have one – and full disclosure, I know someone who’s workin’ for them temporarily, though that hasn’t changed my outlook on the site.

Nope, apparently, there’s a bunch of really smart (HURRRRR) folks out there who have figured out that you should probably avoid using Facebook if you care about your privacy.

Wow – what an earth-shattering revelation. I guess it’s news to these folks, like you should avoid sunbathing if you don’t want suburn, or avoid working in an asbestos mine in 2009 if you don’t want Mesothelioma.

I shudder to think at the magnificent amount of idiocy it takes to think you can go post everything about yourself on the internet (on a “semi-private” site or not) and then be horrified when it shows up elsewhere on the internet.

Or better yet,the skanky girls (and guys) who put naked pictures of themselves on the internet in a locked photobucket, or something like that. They must rationalize it, “oh it’s only in my photobucket” or something. Stop thinking like this right now.

You’re not posting something “on your facebook” you’re posting it on the internet, using facebook. That’s what’s broken here folks, not Facebook’s care (or lack thereof) for your privacy… the expectation of privacy you have when you post your pixelated genitalia on the internet and the shock you have when it shows up “on the internet” is completely and utterly retarded.

Don’t post anything on the internet if you’re not prepared for everyone on the internet to possibly see it.